You’ve been there. Your friend posts a picture of her cutie pie in the car. Your eyes start darting and focusing on every corner of the picture.
Is the vehicle moving?
Is he rear facing?
Is his chest clip where it needs to be?
Maybe I should send her a quick message.
You know what I’m talking about, the kind of message that’s called the ‘compliment sandwich’. Step one, tell her how adorable her kid is. Then tell her that the cup in the cup holder can become a dangerous flying object, but follow it by complimenting little Johnny’s shoes. (While mumbling that your kid only wears hand made moccasins until he starts kindergarten).
Phew. Saved the day with that one.
Oh! Your old highschool friend just posted that she had a baby. You post a quick comment of congratulations, then you scan the rest of the comments. “Did someone ask about vaginal vs cesarean? I wonder if her labor was induced. Do you think she had an epidural? Is that a bottle in the background?”
Then you send her a message (with links of course). You want her to be completely informed of all of the vaccines kids get before age two. You also want to make sure that she avoids ‘toxins’ in her home and she should probably not use dangerous laundry soap anymore just in case Sally drinks some.
Man. What would the internet do without me today?
Aww, your baby just did something super awesome! Hurry take a picture! But wait, before you dare post that picture to Instagram, make sure that there are no baby bottles, chemicals, trash on the floor, or left over spaghetti on her face. You’d hate for anyone to know that you supplement breastmilk with formula occasionally. What would that mom group think of all of the ingredients?!
What would happen if you stopped worrying about what other moms did?
Here’s what we think would happen.
- We think you’d post that picture of your adorable baby with leftover spaghetti on her face because her first steps are kind of important and staging those is not fun.
- We think you’d tell other moms in your mom group that formula isn’t poison and its ok to feed babies using a bottle.
- We think that you’d enjoy eating a hot dog without reading the ingredients first because right now you just want a dang hot dog.
- We also think that you might stop looking for flaws in the pictures that your friends post because you totally understand real life happens.